Saturday, January 16, 2010

The Shoes

I am wearing a pair of shoes. They are ugly shoes. Uncomfortable shoes. I hate my shoes. Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair. Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step. Yet, I continue to wear them. I get funny looks wearing these shoes. They are looks of sympathy. I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs. They never talk about my shoes. To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable. To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them. But, once you put them on, you can never take them off. I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes. There are many pairs in this world. Some women are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them. Some have learned how to walk in them so they don't hurt quite as much. Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt. No woman deserves to wear these shoes. Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger woman. These shoes have given me the strength to face anything. They have made me who I am. I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.


luckyjean said...

Daven, "The Shoes" is a very good analogy for how we grieving moms live with our loss. May I publish your writing in our chapter of The Compassionate Friends newsletter? We send out 350 by snail-mail and another 150 by email. Jean Guettler Luchtefeld, Daven's Mom

IndieBambino said...

This speaks so much to me, and it's so very true. I've found you through Eve, who is a visitor to Glow In The Woods. We lost our son 8 1/2 months ago, and truly, I hate my shoes too, but here I am, walking in them.

"While we try and teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about."